To live your life without even so much as a traffic ticket and then wake up one day and discover that you have been accused of sexually molesting your own daughters is a nightmare beyond description. That is exactly what happened to me and, for the past two years, I was forced into a living hell.

At age 52, the last thing I ever thought about was being convicted of any crime, especially one that I was completely innocent of, yet for the first time in my life, I was facing the possibility of a conviction and a prison term. To say the least, I was in total shock.

My wife and I had separated and she had taken our two daughters with her and filed for a divorce. Later, I discovered that she had been taking our daughters to every doctor and hospital she could, attempting to validate her claims against me for sexual abuse. When that failed, she finally went to the authorities and filed charges against me for molesting my daughters.

I had no knowledge that she had talked with police, but that same evening, when I got home from work, I received a telephone call from a detective who asked if I would come to the local police department the following day and talk with him. When I asked him, regarding what, he told me that it was regarding certain allegations that my daughters had made against me. I had no idea at that point what he was talking about and all I could think of was that I needed an attorney and I needed one fast.

Being that it was too late in the day to reach an attorney, I got on my computer and, using various search engines, began looking for anyone who specialized in false allegations of abuse cases. I found one site, Cowling Investigations, Inc. They appeared to be exactly what I was looking for, but I did not call them, simply because the fees quoted on their page seemed extremely high. Also, I was concerned about using anyone I simply found on the web and was obviously concerned about the old saying, "If it seems too good to be true, it probably is."

As I continued looking at various sites, for some reason, I kept going back to the Cowling site, reading their information and, finally decided to at least call and talk with someone. It was late at night and there was no one at the office, so I tried the cellular telephone, listed on the contact page, and got Allen Cowling.

The first thing that impressed me was the fact that, although it was very late at night and he was working another false allegation case in another state, he still took the time to talk with me. Not once, during the conversation, was he in a rush to get off the telephone. He listened to me and discussed various possibilities for a defense and then recommended that I go ahead and meet with the detective the following day. When I told him I would, he carefully went over with me exactly what I should and should not say. He explained that the detective would be using the interview as a fishing expedition, in an attempt to get me to say something that could later be used against me. He was exactly right, especially when the detective asked me, "Why did I think these girls would make this allegation?" My response was simply that I had no idea. The best advice Cowling gave me was not to "speculate" on anything. If I knew the answer, that was fine, but I was not to respond to anything that I had to "guess" on. The detective also asked if I was willing to take a polygraph test and again, upon Cowling's advice, I told him that I had no problem with the test, but thought I should at least consult with an attorney before I agreed to it.

The next day, following the interview with the detective, I called Cowling again and retained him to come to Chicago for 3 days to help me sort out my problem and form some type defense strategy. I also thought it would be in my best interest to consult with and retain the services of a local attorney, which I did. The attorney seemed to be on fire for me as I talked with him, but after I paid his retainer, his "so-called" defense was nothing more than "Let's not get all excited until we see if this is really going somewhere."

Shortly thereafter, Cowling arrived in Chicago and I will never forget the 3 days I spent with him as long as I live. I was in a complete panic and the thought of suicide had actually crossed my mind several times. The allegations being made against me were enough to send me to prison for the rest of my life. I could not sleep, eat or concentrate on work, so I was also in danger of losing my job on top of everything else.

Cowling spent the first day going over everything with me and then, at breakfast, the following morning, he looked at me, smiled and said, "I'm not worried about the allegations." He told me that everything would work out fine as long as I listened to him and did what he said do. My immediate thought was, "No, I don't guess you are worried." "It's not your butt in the ringer," but time proved that he was absolutely right.

During the 3 days that he spent with me, we carefully went over every aspect of my problem. Then he prepared a written defense strategy for me that also consisted of the reasoning behind his statement that he was not worried. What he had written actually seemed to prove that all of the allegations being made against me were ridiculous. He also advised me to change attorneys and then educated me as to how to retain one that would honestly be beneficial.

My major concern at that point was that Cowling's 3-day trip was ending and I would be on my own once again. While he was with me, at least I felt like I had some help in carrying the load, but as I watched him leave from the airport, I had a sick feeling deep inside. That, however, thankfully, was short lived.

I first contacted Cowling in February, 1999 and my problem did not end until January, 2001, but he was there every step of the way. In addition to the first 3 day trip, he returned to Chicago on one other occasion for 4 days and then I met him in Atlanta for psychological testing. Other than those trips, the balance of our work continued by telephone and through email.

During the time Cowling continued to work with me, he gave me a number of things to personally do, things that I would never have even thought about on my own, and to be honest, things that I never would have considered doing. I did find that every time I listened to him and did as he instructed, it worked out perfectly for me. The only time that I ever had a problem with Cowling was when I failed to do what he suggested, and in each case, I regretted it. Thankfully, in each of those instances, he was always there to put me back in a position where I could go back and accomplish what should have been done the first time, had I listened.

One perfect example was the psychological testing he wanted me to submit to in Atlanta, Georgia. The testing was very expensive and took place over a two day period. I really did not have the funds necessary, nor could I stand to take off from work. This entire mess, obviously, had affected my job and, as I already said, I was on the brink of losing it.

I had other concerns about that testing as well. I knew that part of the testing I would go through was designed to identify "sexual preference." I had talked with someone else who had done similar testing for a criminal matter they were involved in. They told me that they tried to have their testing results admitted into evidence in the same court that I was in for my divorce and custody matter and that their results had been refused. Personally, I could think of every excuse not to submit to the Atlanta testing and talked to Cowling about it. When I explained that it could not be admitted as evidence and I had been told it was a waste of time and money, needless to say, I saw his temper. He flatly stated he did not care what anyone else could or could not have admitted, that he wanted this testing for other reasons and that I needed to decide who I was going to listen to. Obviously, I listened to Cowling. I did go to Atlanta and, thank God, got through all testing perfectly. Immediately after completing the testing, I had a confidence I never had before and Cowling explained that was one of the reasons for the trip. The second reason was his fear that my ex-wife would file a motion to have me evaluated as a potential sex offender and there was no way he wanted to see me exposed to testing by her expert without an ace up my sleeve.

Now, here I have gotten ahead of myself, so let me back up. One of the things Cowling told me during his initial trip to Chicago was, "shut up" and stop trying to defend myself against the allegations my wife was making. He said, "When she talks for 15 minutes, she is credible, but beyond that, it becomes plainly obvious that she is completely crazy." He was exactly right. As we went through the divorce and custody, her ranting finally began to turn the very people she was relying on the most, the police, social workers, etc., against her, which turned into a wonderful blessing.

Now, at the point that I actually went to Atlanta, we had been through a number of divorce and custody hearings. When we began, my wife had custody of our daughters and I certainly did not believe that was in their best interest. My new attorney advised against even asking, but Cowling pushed me until I made him file a motion. Much to our surprise, I was granted temporary custody of my daughters.

The second issue was child support. Again, my attorney advised me not to push that because the judge would not allow it, but again, Cowling pushed me until I finally got that motion filed and again, I was awarded child support.

As time progressed, Cowling recommended that I have my attorney file a motion asking for restricted and supervised visitation. Again, the attorney was reluctant, but again, per the advice of Cowling, I pushed, the motion was filed and the court granted my request.

Sure enough, as Cowling predicted, as we proceeded through the custody issues in the divorce, my wife's attorney did file a motion with the court, asking that I be evaluated by their expert as a possible sex offender. At that point the full realization of why Cowling wanted me to complete the testing in Atlanta became obvious. Without question, he had seen that coming and wanted to protect me. To make a long story short, the court granted the motion to have me evaluated. I was subjected to additional psychological testing, after which my wife's psychiatrist met with me and said he had all the evidence that he needed to support that I was a liar and a child molester. He wrote a report accordingly and submitted it to the court.

Now, understand that at that point, no one, not even my attorney, knew that I had been to Atlanta. Although I did not understand his reasoning, thanks to Cowling's expertise, when I completed my testing in Atlanta, he had my report sent to him and not me. He also asked me not to mention to anyone that I had completed my evaluation there.

After my wife's psychiatrist submitted his report, Cowling sent me my report and told me to go ahead and give it to my attorney. The attorney's initial response was shock that I had not told him and then, probably because of ego, he told me the report of my testing was of no value to me. The following day, however, he called me at work with an entirely different attitude and said he wanted to take the report straight to the judge. Cowling evidently had also seen that coming because he warned me not to let my attorney do anything with it until all reports from my wife's "expert" psychiatrist had been submitted.

Cowling's idea was to say nothing about my report at all, even in discovery, and only use it when my wife's psychiatrist was on the witness stand as rebuttal. There was a great deal of discussion regarding that matter between me and my attorney. He said he had no choice, that he had to at least provide it as discovery or we may be barred from using it altogether. I talked to Cowling and he said, as long as the opposing side had submitted all their reports, to go ahead and provide it to my wife's attorney.

When my test results were submitted, needless to say, the other side went completely ballistic. My wife's "expert" psychiatrist, who was ready and eager to destroy me, met me in the hallway of the courthouse the day he was to testify and asked me why I had not disclosed to him the fact that I had already been through psychological testing. When I told him it was of no concern to him, he told me that, based on the testing I had completed in Atlanta, he had changed his opinion and his testimony would reflect that he found nothing to support that I had done anything wrong. I might add here that Cowling and I are now doing the research that will provide me with the ability to file a malpractice suit against that psychiatrist.

At the end of the trial, I was granted full custody of my daughters, my ex-wife was ordered to pay child support, she was restricted to 4 hours a week supervised visitation with our daughters, and she was ordered to pay $44,000.00, one half of my legal expense.

As I said earlier, I have actually walked through the gates of hell, but I am convinced that I never would have made it had it not been for Cowling. Many times, as we went through this, Cowling appeared hard and cold, but that was not the case. He would get upset at me when I was not following the plan that had been developed. In the long run, I learned that he did care, and very much, about me and the welfare of my children. He just refused to lose and refused to listen to any of my excuses as to why I was unable to accomplish something that was important. Yes, he was rough on occasion and did have a temper, but, as I said, he was there throughout the entire ordeal and the result was that there was no arrest and no indictment. All of the charges were seen as being false and I actually got custody of the very daughters I had been accused of abusing. My ex-wife, who did her best to destroy me and send me to prison, got limited and restricted visitation. What a miracle that was.

The one biggest compliment regarding my association with Cowling was that he educated me so I could deal properly with my attorney. That was fantastic because the attorney never knew Cowling even existed and thought that I was the one with all the experience and intelligence.

As I went through my 2-year ordeal, I learned many things. There is a great deal involved in defending any false allegation case, but I will guarantee you that whatever is spent on the front end is far less if the allegations can be stopped before they get into the criminal system, as mine was. The best recommendation I can give to anyone who has been falsely accused is, don't wait for an indictment, or even an arrest. The minute an allegation surfaces, call Cowling and begin your defense then. Do not take a false allegation lightly, under any circumstances. There are hundreds of innocent men in prison today because they were convicted of molesting a child, simply because the child said so. To make matters worse, even when someone gets by the criminal threat, they can find themselves in civil court, being sued by the child they allegedly molested. These are no-win situations.

Money is a factor to anyone, as it was to me and, as I said earlier, when I first found Cowling's website, I did not call him because I thought his fees were extremely high. That was not the case. I actually paid Cowling far less than I paid my first attorney, who did absolutely nothing and Cowling was there from the beginning to the end. I could never have made it without him. Both me and my daughters appreciate his efforts more than words could ever define.

As with me, when falsely accused, it is not unusual for someone to panic, select the first attorney they talk with and "hope for the best." With that type defense, it is also not unusual for a jury to find, "guilty as charged." Never lose sight of the fact that it takes a jury about 5 seconds to give their verdict and that verdict will be based on what has been presented to them and what they believe. If anyone, being wrongfully accused, has had no defense prepared and the jury believes the accused is a child molester, prison is inevitable.

Without question, preparing a proper defense can be costly and cost is certainly a factor, but what if you spend the next 20 years of your life in prison? How much could you have made during the time you spent in prison? Wouldn't it have been a great deal more than what it would have cost you to defend the allegation? I have talked to many people who have been in the same situation I was and the sad truth is, many of them put together a half-hearted defense, were convicted and then decided they wanted to fight. Their poor defense effort was based strictly on the fact that they knew they had done nothing wrong and never believed they could be convicted of a crime they had not committed.

When someone is convicted, they quickly realize that the cost of reversing that conviction will be far more then the cost would have been had they initially prepared a proper defense, and even if their conviction could be reversed, they will normally spend a minimum of four years in prison. Even after that four years, if the court sets aside their conviction, they are by no means, home free. The fact is, they find themselves back at square one. The conviction was most likely set aside in favor of a new trial, so now, after the high cost of reversing their conviction, they will return to trial and either be acquitted or convicted again.

The solution really is simple; do it right the first time. That being said, how does one do it right? Obviously, any accused will need a good attorney, but finding that attorney can be quite an ordeal. The world is full of lawyers who will tell you they can move mountains before you actually retain and pay them, but after they get their fee, you cannot even get a telephone call returned. Your attorney is vital. It is not a good idea to learn that you have the wrong one while you are selecting a jury.

By far, one of the most important things for anyone facing a false allegation of sexual abuse is to get personally involved and learn their own defense, inside and out, as I did. After all, the accused is the only person facing prison and always remember that everyone in prison today had an attorney.

One final comment on Cowling. What sets him apart from many other experts I have dealt with is the fact that he is not a politician and could care less whether he is or is not liked by other defense team members. He is a perfectionist and demands that everyone else act accordingly. He is totally and strictly devoted to his client and their welfare and has absolutely no problem in calling a defense team member down when they become lax. Having the life of someone in the palm of his hand is not something Cowling has, or ever will take lightly.

When retained, Cowling instructs his client as to exactly what and what not to do, what and what not to say and then determines if there is any testing, psychological or otherwise, that will benefit the client as well as what experts may assist in the overall defense. In short, Cowling's goal is to walk any client, a step-at-a-time, through the entire ordeal and educate that client so that they become involved in their own defense.

I am currently involved in the final aspect of my civil litigation, in that my ex-wife has appealed the court's decision, so at this point, I will simply identify myself as Gary M. When my present legal involvement is complete, I will identify myself fully and be happy to talk personally with anyone who finds themselves in the same mess I did. I would hope that no one will have to face what I have, but there will be others, many others, and I wanted to at least share what I went through to show that, when you believe there is no hope, there is. You just cannot give up.

You have accessed one of the many pages here at the Cowling Investigations, Inc., a False Allegation Defense Website. For an explanation of how we assist our clients who have been falsely accused, see Our Expertise, We Can Help. If you have been falsely accused, see What to Do - What Not to Do When Falsely Accused.